The Harrowing/Heartwarming Parent Moment of the Week

Warning!!! As I was at a writer’s conference on my blogging day last week, today we will cover a full two weeks of harrowing/heartwarming moments.

All of these injuries occurred during a single 60 min. period.

Sweet Boy#1–Comes inside crying. He was flying his kite, tripped over Shamu our dog, and hit his head on the gravel driveway. He also got a big scrape on his elbow.

Sweet Boy#1–Was flying his kite on the sports court, ran smack into me, knocked the breath out of me and knocked himself onto the ground.

Sweet Boy#1–Was jumping from rock to rock barefoot down by the sports court. Landed on a sharp rock and cut his foot. The cut was over an inch long and bled all over the place. He had blood all over both legs and dripping everywhere!

Sweet Boy#2–Tries to catch a strange black grasshopper. But somehow the hairs or spines on it hurt his hands and he comes in crying with bright red sore fingers.

Ok, that is the end of the hour of horror.

Sweet Boy#3–Slips on a slide at church and whacks his chin, giving himself a knot and bright black bruise that lasts two weeks.

Sweet Boy#2–Pours granulated sugar off of his plate and onto his little brother’s head.

Sweet Boy#1–Makes his teacher re-print his mother’s day essay because the teacher made the description of the mothers day cake say that it was 1 and 1/2 feet tall instead of 2 and 1/2 feet tall.

In find a sure fire way to get the boys to eat protein. Boil a hot dog, put it on a fork, make a small pile of sugar on their plates, and instruct them to dip their hot dog into the sugar. They especially enjoy the way the warm meat melts the sugar making at attractive and tasty glaze.

Sweet Boy#2–I tell him to go and rinse his flosser and toothbrush. He does…in the toilet!

Sweet Boy#2–Stuffs a sliver of bar soap into the handsoap dispenser clogging it.

I find a lump of pitch on my desk. I am about to throw it away when the Hunky Hubby rescues it. He was saving it, for firestarter. He is also trying to ruthlessly clean his office. Might have to remind him of the definition of ruthless.

Sweet Boy#2–Rubs his toothbrush into the carpet, then complains that it is “dirty”. I tell him to wash it. Now it is “too soapy”. It tell him to rinse it and instead he spreads himself with a slimy layer of handsoap all the way from his thighs down to his ankles on both legs! Ah mental breakdown, thine name is bedtime.

The winner this fortnight…

I have stopped allowing the boys to bathe all together. But I had to run and answer the phone and they all rushed quickly and got into the tub in one fell swoop. While I was cleaning the kitchen and talking on the phone (I know I know…should never have done it) the boys scooped potty water out of the toilet with a hat and various tub toys and transferred it to their tub. They also put several toys in the potty and two of them dunked their feet in. With their cries of horror ringing in our ears, The Hunky Hubby and I threw out all of the contaminated toys. I am done washing bathtub toys in the dishwasher to sanitize them from such horrors. They are gone gone gone. My oldest tearfully informed me that we were wasting our money by throwing them away. An accountant and perpetrator of germ infested acts of treason. Man I love those little boys.